andaikumenjadipelangi

sudikah engkau menjadi awannya.

Haish. its too late to turn back time. whats done is done. I've made wrong moves, did stupid things that somehow made you 'afraid' of me. i realize that only after my friend told me. you know, when someone is in love, he sees nothing. he sees nothing that is wrong or weird. when actually what he's doing is all wrong and weird. in a sense, people who are not in love will not normally do. get me?

that long journey just to get what she wants. the long wait just to see that face. that sacrifice just to see that smile. its all somehow, stupid. for now it is.  what for? all that effort if the person doesn't like you. people will tell the most obvious thing to do. forget her. move on you idiot.

but someone told me a different answer. tell her.

maybe i should? maybe i should not. i am afraid things will change. we might not look at each other again. we will not talk to each other again. awkward. but its true what my friend said. if im just gonna keep all this feelings inside, i'll never really know whats going on. the feelings gonna kill me inside. but there's this thing that keeps me from telling her.

apart from the awkwardness. i know, its not right to tell what i feel. maybe i'll just act normal. like as if nothing is happening in me. im trying hard to fight these feelings. maybe, someday, things will change for the better.

Only Allah knows.

Assalamu'alaikum.