School

im officially, stressed. Theres so much things to be done within this month. Doa, a weapon during this tough period. nevertheless..i should spend time wisely now. good day friends :)

Aidiladha

Started the day by making my way to the mosque. the morning calmness, was so peaceful and makes me want to continue sleep again. haha. Takbir till 8am and performed solat aidiladha at Al khair. after that i went straight home and ate my mum's rendang. its a fulllerrrmak! sedap hingga menjilat kaki.

Then, my mum asked, "kambing mane? tk bwk balek?" haha. i just said i did'nt even took a glance of the goats. then she asked me to follow my uncle to collect the distributed goat meat. haiya..i was about to fall asleep with my full stomach. so i followed my uncle to mosque.

At the mosque..there was along queue, all want to collect the meat. in my mind i said, the goat is not even sacrificed yet and there's ardy a long queue..haha, kiasu people. i followed my uncle to the back of the mosque to see the goats. i was mesmerised by the scene. all the imams and ustaz together with the volunteers was there getting ready to sacrifice the goats.

i stood behind one of the gates and watched as the goats were sacrificed. It was really a gruesome scene for first timer like me. but then, i wanted to be part of them, to be there to help out with the ibadah korban. so i approached one of the staff at the gate whether i can enter and help. he said its only for volunteers. felt disappointed. Then, my uncle came by. My uncle used to be the person who sacrificed the goats..so he was well-known there. then he recommend the uncle to take me as a volunteer! haha..i was so happy when i stepped into the slaughtering ground. i was assigned to hold the goat when is it about to be sacrificed.

It could'nt get much better when i was assigned to one of my favourite imam of al khair. He was so cheerful and gave me a lot of tips and facts about sacrificing the goats. then, comes the goat on my table. i quickly grab hold of its feet. then i laid my arms on the body. the sheep was shivering. yelling some things which sounded like "help help."

So, firstly, the person who paid for the goat, was called into the slaughtering ground. and were asked whether it is a korban or aqiqah. then a tag was placed on the goat's right leg. then, the person is asked whether he want to korban the goat himself or allow the imam to do so. so yea..the imam was given the permission to slaughter the goat on behalf of the person's name. so here it starts. Hj Sunni, felt for the windpipe or something on the goat's neck. then he held it. before piercing through the neck, he set his niat first. then he recite, "Bismillahi Allahu Akbar!"

the people holding the goat recited the takbir together. The blood from the neck would spurt out like a fountain. once, the blood spurted on the side of my face. the blood is quite warm... during this period, some goat were forcing away like mad and we have to use all our strength to hold the goat. some died peacefully, with little movement from them. So yea..everything went smoothly. Hope you had a better Aidiladha than me..take care!

here are some pictures

A Broken Arm

I was at first clueless of what's happening. He was shouting lying down on the mat. then i noticed his arm was..broken! Gosh..never thought this kind of incident could happen. and it happened right in front of my eyes.

It was silat training and coach taught us how to do Sapuan. after that, he decided to hold a sparring session. it was my first time. Everyone had a partner except for me. i was kind of disappointed. then i heard some of them saying i would be sparring with the coach himself! haha. but then, it did'nt happen. it was going to be my turn, but because of the eerie incident, the sparring was stopped. Hopefully he'll recover soon. Everything happens for a reason..somehow, it tells me that i am not ready yet, Allah knows best. InsyaAllah next time coach!

Nah, we're not gay. just close friends whom i love so very the much. haha. Now i know how rafie feels. each time i meet them, i feel like hugging them. but its just hard to do. Rafie, next time i meet you, we're gonna hug like the banglas do. heheh. The banglas for some reason, shows care and love for each other. each time they meet, i would see them hug for a few secs, then kiss on the cheeks. the good banglas i mean..those i see in the mosque. so yea..not to say friends, i forgot the last time i hug my mum and dad. i want to..but it just doesnt happen. when i leave the house, its just a "bye mak". hopefully things will change in future. it'll be "sayang mak :)"

Dari mane?

Last Friday was, awesome. more than awesome actually.

Mmm..so far i've just started on my chem report. there's still lost more to be done before december arrives. it used to be that December were our long awaited holiday. but now its the not so awaited mid test.

okay. It feels like im not myself again. suddenly i feel so out of place. you know, the feeling of being pushed aside and being left alone in the dark. hah. i dunno why this thing happens. when this feeling comes, i spend most of my time lying down, see the sky moves elegantly. haha..some emo shit huh. yeaa..dont worry about me, the feeling will go away once i see my beloved friends :)

till then, take care peeps :D

its another round of reports and assignments. i just have to start early to avoid last minute work. worse, dateline is shorter this sem. O M A!!

Itself

Lets just say whatever happens in your life, its meant for you. Because everyone is special in their own ways. Regardless matreps, minah, or the nerd guy in your class. Allah is Great, He does whatever He wants.

Dont think that the person is matrep, you are much better than him. maybe the sins that you've done is much more worse than the sins that the matreps have done. i know its naive to say this but we just have to love everyone and see ourself as the most pitiful, sinnest person in the world. Honestly, when i see bunch of matreps, i dont dare look at them in their eyes. the feeling of "fear" suddenly overpowers me that i try to avoid them. Is this right? its just that, we see them as 'higher' than us, because they dare to hurt someone without using their brains but just follow their anger.

Maybe its just that their tattoos and piercing made them look more fierce. whatever la..one day i wish these matreps become an ustaz or something so that they can help change live with their own experience and one fine day, matreps will not exist anymore..aminnn.

Coincidence?

I believe theres's no such thing as coincidence. Everything that happened, was meant to happen. Like yesterday, I was quite feeling down coming back from school after silat training at around 830pm, eating my cookie, suddenly someone called me from behind. I turned and there's no other person that i wanted to see other than him..alhamdullilah God let us meet, even at time we least excpected :)

So yeaa..cant wait for this friday!!! because..after so long, finally get to overnight at the beach! woohoo! with Hanis Yaqub and Faizul. just chill at the beach..enjoy the view and be amazed by the morning sunrise..total awesomeness! Hopefully the weather wouldn't disappoint us..Till then, Enjoy the looong weekends!

Isnin

Seems like blogging is the only place i turn to when i have nobody to share my feelings with. how sad.

Today quite slack in school,our chem lecturer went on conference for one week and left us with online assignment due this week. So we had about 4 hours break. did some project works..after school decided to karaoke at school. but, suddenly i had absolutely no mood for karaoke. which is very rare. so i did'nt. when i really did'nt know what to do (bcos gg home would only lead me to sleeping), my mum suddenly called. She wanted to visit Iqbal! haha..so i accompanied my mum. were surprised to see my aunts were also there. yeaa..kissed on the cheeks and said goodbye after that.

Went to JP to eat at banquet. i ordered ayam penyet, which the sambal is superb. got my ears burning. love it :) soo..after that went home. and finally, thnx a lot for the text message in the morning, it really made my day, a pleasant surprise :)yeaa..thats how my monday went.

I just need someone, before i become somebody that's a nobody.